Casino Normale American Dad

Casino Normale Klaus: Vaginas don't count. They're like all over the place. Throw a rock, you'll hit three. Bazooka Steve Roger (as he's coming in the kitchen, pulling a cart): In a school fire, you gotta know what you want, 'cuz the clock is ticking, but I nailed it. Francine steals from the CIA and pretends to be a super villain to incite Stan to be more seductive; Roger tricks Hayley and Steve into trapping Jay Leno so he can take revenge. Out of Focus: 'Casino Normale' was his last speaking appearance to date (and even then, he was voiced by someone else). The Rival: Duper is Stan's rival at the CIA who, claiming to be 'a big fan', is effectively replacing Stan by beating his time on the test course, taking his bran muffin and analyzing terrorist chatter while Stan is bumped. Directed by Shawn Murray, Ron Hughart. With Seth MacFarlane, Wendy Schaal, Scott Grimes, Rachael MacFarlane. Francine steals from the CIA and pretends to be a sexy supervillain to incite Stan to be more seductive. Roger tricks Hayley and Steve into trapping Jay Leno so he can take revenge on him.

1. American Dad Casino Normale
2. Casino Normale From American Dad
3. American Dad Casino Normale Music
4. American Dad Casino Normale Full Episode

Turner International operates versions of core Turner brands, including CNN, TNT, Cartoon Network, Boomerang and TCM Turner Classic Movies, as well as country- and region-specific networks and businesses in Latin America, Europe, the Middle East, Africa and Asia Pacific. It manages the business of Pay- and Free-TV-channels, as well as Internet-based services, and oversees commercial partnerships with various third-party media ventures; it teams with Warner Bros. and HBO to leverage Time Warner's global reach. Turner operates more than 180 channels showcasing 46 brands in 34 languages in over 200 countries. Turner International is a Time Warner company.

Get another version Upload subtitles. Casino Normale. 22:00. TBS. 2017-05-01.

Miracle Workers

Season 1

The Heaven-set workplace comedy is based on Simon Rich's book What In God's Name and stars Daniel Radcliffe, Steve Buscemi, Geraldine Viswanathan, and Karan Soni.

I Am The Night

Season 1

From executive producer Patty Jenkins, I Am the Night tells the incredible story of Fauna Hodel (India Eisley) who was given away at birth. As Fauna begins to investigate the secrets to her past, she follows a sinister trail that swirls ever closer to an infamous Hollywood gynecologist, Dr. George Hodel (Jefferson Mays), a man involved in the darkest Hollywood debauchery.

Those Who Can't

SEASON 3

Those Who Can't is truTV's first foray into full-length scripted comedy. Casino manhattan ny. The half-hour show follows three trouble-making teachers, played by show creators Adam Cayton-Holland, Andrew Orvedahl and Ben Roy of the Denver-based comedy troupe The Grawlix.

The Last OG

Season 2

Poker gto software. Tray (Tracy Morgan) goes all in on his dreams of becoming a chef and Shay (Tiffany Haddish) has an intriguing business venture of her own on the horizon. The series, co-created by Jordan Peele, debuted in 2018 as the #1 new cable comedy.

The Last OG

Season 2 airing now on TBS

Tray (Tracy Morgan) goes all in on his dreams of becoming a chef and Shay (Tiffany Haddish) has an intriguing business venture of her own on the horizon. The series, co-created by Jordan Peele, debuted in 2018 as the #1 new cable comedy.

Final Space

Season 2 Coming soon to tBS

An astronaut named Gary and his planet-destroying sidekick called Mooncake embark on serialized journeys through space in order to unlock the mystery of where the universe actually ends and if it actually does exist.

Tell Me Your Secrets

Coming soon to tNT

Tell Me Your Secrets centers on a trio of characters each with a mysterious and troubling past, including Emma, a young woman who once looked into the eyes of a dangerous killer, John, a former serial predator desperate to find redemption and Mary, a grieving mother obsessed with finding her missing daughter.

Raised By Wolves

Coming soon to tNT

Ridley Scott's television directorial debut centers upon two androids tasked with raising human children on a mysterious virgin planet. As the burgeoning colony of humans threatens to be torn apart by religious differences the androids learn that controlling the beliefs of humans is a treacherous and difficult task.

Harrah's Ak-Chin is more than just a casino. It is a place to indulge all your senses. Ach chin casino arizona entertainment. Harrah's Ak-Chin Casino is Phoenix's home for the hottest slots, in denominations ranging from pennies to $25. You'll find nearly 1,135 games including video reels, video poker, multi-line games, multipliers, progressives and many more. Shows & Entertainment at Harrah's Ak-Chin Experience our bar and lounge! Featuring a variety of performances from local acts to great tribute bands and national headliners, there's something for everyone. Harrah's Ak-Chin Casino Resort We enjoy the rooms in the resort since they have a tub as well as a free standing shower. The food is outstanding - we ate at the Chop,Block and Brew, Agave's and the Grill. The menus are diverse.

Seasons:123456789101112131415 | Main

American Dad! is an American adult animated sitcom created by created by Seth MacFarlane, Mike Barker and Matt Weitzman.

Father's Daze[edit]

Klaus: Damn, Steve! You wake up camera ready, lucky dog! Takes me hours to shake that 'just woke up' look.

Steve: No time for what?

Klaus: And your morning voice sounds clear as a sparrow! Me? Forget about it! No phone calls before noon.

Steve: Klaus, I have to get started on my dad's present.

Klaus: Damn, and no morning breath? Do you sleep with mints in your mouth?

Hayley: It turns out the only thing that makes you a good dad is being a guilty dad.

Stan: Yeah! And that's the true meaning of Father's Day.

Steve: NO!!

Francine: That's just a character flaw!

Stan: Noticing my flaws.. and my strengths. Is that the true meaning of Father's Day?

Steve: Dad, I'll explain it all in the back of that guy's pickup.

Fight and Flight[edit]

Mr. Herschel: Look, this vape pen isn't gonna smoke itself behind the gym. The 'F' stands.

Steve: F? F? F? F? F?! F?! F?! F?!

Toshi: [in Japanese] He's gonna lose his shit!

[Steve starts screaming]

Barry: Don't worry, Barry know what to do! [He grabs Snot's Zoloft, tackles Steve and dumps several pills in his mouth]

Steve: [slowly] Now it's just gonna take me longer to finish freaking out.

Stan: [reviewing Steve's script] This still doesn't feel like a guaranteed 'A'. Atlantic Ocean? Pacific's bigger. Steve's teacher will find that much more impressive.

Steve: I think maybe he'll care a little bit more about historical accuracy.

Stan: Uh.. if I didn't care about historical accuracy, would I have stolen the actual Spirit of St. Louis from the Smithsonian?

Steve: What?!

Stan: The toughest part was convincing the guard I came in with it.

The Enlightenment of Ragi-Baba[edit]

Hayley:Why don't you come down to the yoga and meditation center with me? I think it could really help you learn to love yourself.

Roger: I love myself all the time. At least once in the morning, and usually right before I go to sleep.

Hayley: Well, it sounds like your afternoon's wide open.

Roger: Yeah, we can go right after I jerk off.

Steve: Should should we turn on the TV?

Francine: I hope you guys are hungry, because I got us dinner reservations! We're gonna try something new and exciting. Sushi.

Stan: Geez, Francine, we just tried stromboli two years ago. Can you let us catch our damn breath?

Francine:Oh, please, Stan. You know I've been wanting to get more culture in our lives.

Stan: Culture? I thought you said you wanted more vulture in our lives. Fine, I'll go, but you'll have to figure out what to do with these gentlemen.

Vulture 1: It's alright we've got tickets for the theater, and if we don't leave now, we shall miss the curtain. I'll have Marcus bring up the car.

Vulture 2: Marcus is another bird.

Roger: I'm so nervous Hayley What if everyone notices me and calls me names? What if one of the names is Piss Head?

Hayley: Roger, this place is about removing your anxiety. They love me, and they're going to love you too.

Gina: Okay. Welcome, everyone. I hope I'm not being too forceful.

Chad: You're fine I'm Chad, this is Gina, and this is a giant crystal. The three of us will be guiding you today. Oh, it looks like we have some new faces here.

Portrait of Francine's Genitals[edit]

Principal Lewis: Steve, what's gotten into you? Your skin is clear, your voice sounds deeper.

Steve: Oh, it started happening once I stopped touching myself all the time.

Principal Lewis: Funny. I find the more I touch myself, the deeper my voice gets.

Steve: Let's just say I hope Lindsay's call was monitored and recorded, 'cause it was sexy as hell!

Klaus: Oh, Steve.

Steve: You sound just like Lindsay!

Bahama Mama[edit]

Stan: Ah, Saturday afternoon TV. Where the sneaky networks hide all the good shows. [changes channel] A guy with question marks on his suit yelling tax secrets at me. [changes channel] Rick Steves' Glory Hole in Europe. [changes channel] And of course, the secret final episode of Caroline in the City.

[Cut to Caroline carrying an axe covered in blood with a crazed look on her face looking at her other cast members brutally killed]

Caroline: Now the city is mine!

[Stan laughs]

Stan: Still holds up!

Roger: Well, suck me off through a hole and call me Rick Steves, what is this?

Steve: It's Baywatch. You've never seen Baywatch?

Francine: You like this, Roger?

Roger: Franny, I like the smell of gasoline. I like to play with Stan's ding-a-ling while he sleeps. This.. this I love!

Stan: Wait, wh-what was the second thing?

Roger's Baby[edit]

Hayley: Where did you get a pregnancy test with sound effects?

Jeff: At Spencer's Gifts.

Roger: Let's call him Jeff. I'm starting to think Tristan is a gay lion's name.

Ninety North, Zero West[edit]

Francine: Santa has kidnapped Steve!

Jack: Steve Harvey? Santa's gone too far this time!

Santa: So you're really not here to foil my plans?

Steve: No, I swear! I was just trying to have a nice Christmas.

Santa: Then what am I hassling you for? [to his henchman] Cut his throat. But make it Christmas-y

Whole Slotta Love[edit]

Steve: You don't know anything about being a flight attendant.

Roger: But I do know comedy, and that's all that matters at Southwest.

Hayley: With you there, people should check their sensitivities at the gate.

Roger: Oh my God, that's like a perfect Southwest joke! I want that joke!

American Dad Casino Normale

Klaus: I've been experimenting with steroids. It's awesome! Now I wear tank tops with the thinnest straps you've ever seen.

The Witches of Langley[edit]

Toshi: [in Japanese] This day has been badass.

Steve: It sure has, Toshi, my friend. Hey! I understand Tosh!

Toshi: [in Japanese] Finally! Now that we can communicate, there is something I must tell you.. I absolutely adore the Pirates of the Caribbean movies.

Steve: Oh. Cool.

Snot: We used the book, and it worked. But then all the power went straight to Steve's head.

Roger: When you're older, I'll show you where all the power goes straight to on me.

A Nice Night for a Drive[edit]

Steve: This is pretty high up. What if the egg shatters their windshield?

Snot: I thought you might say that. [He pulls out a cracked egg] Pre-cracked shells.

Steve: God, you know me.

Casino Normale[edit]

Klaus: Vaginas don't count. They're like all over the place. Throw a rock, you'll hit three.

Bazooka Steve[edit]

Roger(as he's coming in the kitchen, pulling a cart): In a school fire, you gotta know what you want, 'cuz the clock is ticking, but I nailed it. I got an overhead projector, a hand turkey by 'Emily C.', and 12 dozen smoke-damaged copies of Hatchet.

Hayley: Oh yeah, I owe you a dime. Just grab it out of the change bowl.

Roger: Is there a thousand dollars cash in that bowl? 'Cause that's what a dime is in gambler's lingo.

Hayley: Who knows that?!

Jeff: Everyone knows that, babe. I thought you were crazy to make that bet. I almost said something.

Roger: It had been days since Hayley watched MasterChef Junior with me. I told her I'd wait for her, but I didn't. I couldn't. Peyton made a souffle. Eight years old, making a souffle. Imagine that.

Camp Campawanda[edit]

Snot: Camper Steve was about to commit a panty raid.

Chief Danny: By himself? That's kind of a bummer.

Steve: Okay, guys. I did a little panty raid recon on the girl's cabin..

Paul: Actually, we're not doing the panty raid.

Steve: Why not?

Paul: Well, we've talked about it and we get the feeling that you're a pretty nerdy fourteen year old. But us, we're pretty cool ten-year-olds. I've kissed three girls this summer. So we're feeling we should avoid anything that you do.

Steve: Okay, first of all, Paul.. fuck you.

Julia Rogerts[edit]

Roger: My roses are like bones in a desert.

Old Lady: I haven't had a bone in my desert in years.

Steve: Jeff is meeting Barry today. I need the room.

Hayley: Oh God, that's today? I have to give Jeff his bath!

Steve: [to Hayley] You were supposed to give him a bath last night! [to Francine] And you were supposed to go to the mall!

Francine: I didn't want to go by myself.

Steve: That's what we have Klaus for.

The Life and Times of Stan Smith[edit]

Klaus: [On visiting Arizona State] Oh, man. If you knew what I had in store for you, all your worries would melt away. You'd be swaddled tight, wrapped safely in my freshly laundered plans.

Steve: Klaus, what the fuck are you talking about?

Francine: [Concerned about shocking Stan] Roger. this finger zapping thing isn't going to hurt, right?

Roger: Not a bit. [Stan collapses in convulsions as Roger shocks him]

Francine: You said it wouldn't hurt.

Roger: No, I said it wouldn't hurt me. You need to listen girl.

The Bitchin' Race[edit]

Klaus: [Watching Meredith and Justin on television] I know I should root for someone in the family, but Justin has captured my heart. Oh, I'd love to throw it to his mom while he was sleeping like an angel in the next room.

Roger: [Interpreting a bar patron's drink order as a pick up] Whoa, you got the wrong idea. I'm not some prostitute who's going to take you to the back room. I'm a freewheeling party boy who'll slob your knob right here. Just untuck your Tommy Bahama and give me a little privacy curtain.

Family Plan[edit]

Casino Normale From American Dad

Nicholas: And these must be my granddaughters.

Francine: Um, yes, yes, they are.

Steve: Mom!

Francine: Just go with it.

[After learning that Cassandra committed suicide]

Steve: Momma, the man said someone died upstairs. What if I see a g-g-g-ghost?

Francine: I don't know Steve, you'll probably p-p-p-piss your pants.

The Long Bomb[edit]

Stan: [Imitating Steve] Hey mom, where's the applesauce? [Imitating Francine] In the fridge, Steve. [Imitating Steve] I only see watery-ass Kroger, where's the Mott's? [Imitating Francine] They taste the same. [Imitating Steve] HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIIIIIIND?!

Johnny Concussion: Johnny Concussion always gets up.

Kloger[edit]

American Dad Casino Normale Music

Steve: Snot, we're screwed. This guy's gonna put us back in diapers.

Snot: What do you mean, 'back in'? Some of us never left.

Roger: Text bubbles are made out of flesh-eating bacteria. You didn't know that?

Garbage Stan[edit]

Klaus: I really hope there's a Darryl Strawberry rookie card in your grandpop's unit.

Steve: Sorry, Klaus. Even if we found a Rebecca Lobo rookie card, I'd leave it there. Dad would be so angry if he found out about this. I just wanna learn a little bit more about Grandpa.

Klaus: You'd take the Lobo.

Steve: I'd have to.

Stan: The way the dashboard and the windshield smush the hash browns together with the sausage..

Steve: We should call 'em 'dash browns.'

Stan: You just think of that?

Steve: Just now.

The Talented Mr. Dingleberry[edit]

Roger: [whispering] Hey. Hey. Up here. [Steve looks up, to see Roger in a vent] Want to get back at A.J. and win that talent show? I can help.

Steve: [walks under Roger's vent and looks at in quizzically] What-- what are you doing in there?

Roger: I'm trapped. I dropped a Skittle down a vent, and I went in after it. I've been in here for days. Get a Phillips-head screwdriver and meet me by the vent in Hayley's bathroom. [notices something offscreen] Oh. Oh, there-- uhp, there's the Skittle. Went down this slightly narrower passageway here.

[Roger crawls further into the vents offscreen, until a metallic scraping sound is heard, and the sound of his crawling abruptly stops]

Roger: Shit.

Steve: Wow, you move just like a dummy!

[Roger slaps Steve]

Roger: Now, Steve. Why do you think I slapped you? It's because you used a certain word. Do you know what that word is?

Steve: Is it..

[Roger slaps Steve again]

Roger: That's right. Never, ever call me a dummy. The word 'dummy' is degrading. I am a manually-articulated performative kinesio-maquette.. named Dudley Dingleberry.

Steve: Please tell me you didn't have anything to do with A.J.'s accident.

Roger: Let's just say that as far as us winning the talent show goes, the bar was just lowered.

Steve: That, uh.. that's not the most convincing denial.

[after Roger has injected Steve with paralyzing agent, knocking him out]

Roger: The show must go on.

[Roger looks over, and sees Klaus watching in shock and holding a book]

Klaus: A-Am I early for book club?

Roger: No, you're late! And that's two weeks in a row! You're out!

Klaus: I didn't read it anyway.

Father's Daze[edit]

Klaus: Damn, Steve! You wake up camera ready, lucky dog! Takes me hours to shake that 'just woke up' look.

Steve: No time for what?

Klaus: And your morning voice sounds clear as a sparrow! Me? Forget about it! No phone calls before noon.

Steve: Klaus, I have to get started on my dad's present.

Klaus: Damn, and no morning breath? Do you sleep with mints in your mouth?

Hayley: It turns out the only thing that makes you a good dad is being a guilty dad.

Stan: Yeah! And that's the true meaning of Father's Day.

Steve: NO!!

Francine: That's just a character flaw!

Stan: Noticing my flaws.. and my strengths. Is that the true meaning of Father's Day?

Steve: Dad, I'll explain it all in the back of that guy's pickup.

Fight and Flight[edit]

Mr. Herschel: Look, this vape pen isn't gonna smoke itself behind the gym. The 'F' stands.

Steve: F? F? F? F? F?! F?! F?! F?!

Toshi: [in Japanese] He's gonna lose his shit!

[Steve starts screaming]

Barry: Don't worry, Barry know what to do! [He grabs Snot's Zoloft, tackles Steve and dumps several pills in his mouth]

Steve: [slowly] Now it's just gonna take me longer to finish freaking out.

Stan: [reviewing Steve's script] This still doesn't feel like a guaranteed 'A'. Atlantic Ocean? Pacific's bigger. Steve's teacher will find that much more impressive.

Steve: I think maybe he'll care a little bit more about historical accuracy.

Stan: Uh.. if I didn't care about historical accuracy, would I have stolen the actual Spirit of St. Louis from the Smithsonian?

Steve: What?!

Stan: The toughest part was convincing the guard I came in with it.

The Enlightenment of Ragi-Baba[edit]

Hayley:Why don't you come down to the yoga and meditation center with me? I think it could really help you learn to love yourself.

Roger: I love myself all the time. At least once in the morning, and usually right before I go to sleep.

Hayley: Well, it sounds like your afternoon's wide open.

Roger: Yeah, we can go right after I jerk off.

Steve: Should should we turn on the TV?

Francine: I hope you guys are hungry, because I got us dinner reservations! We're gonna try something new and exciting. Sushi.

Stan: Geez, Francine, we just tried stromboli two years ago. Can you let us catch our damn breath?

Francine:Oh, please, Stan. You know I've been wanting to get more culture in our lives.

Stan: Culture? I thought you said you wanted more vulture in our lives. Fine, I'll go, but you'll have to figure out what to do with these gentlemen.

Vulture 1: It's alright we've got tickets for the theater, and if we don't leave now, we shall miss the curtain. I'll have Marcus bring up the car.

Vulture 2: Marcus is another bird.

Roger: I'm so nervous Hayley What if everyone notices me and calls me names? What if one of the names is Piss Head?

Hayley: Roger, this place is about removing your anxiety. They love me, and they're going to love you too.

Gina: Okay. Welcome, everyone. I hope I'm not being too forceful.

Chad: You're fine I'm Chad, this is Gina, and this is a giant crystal. The three of us will be guiding you today. Oh, it looks like we have some new faces here.

Portrait of Francine's Genitals[edit]

Principal Lewis: Steve, what's gotten into you? Your skin is clear, your voice sounds deeper.

Steve: Oh, it started happening once I stopped touching myself all the time.

Principal Lewis: Funny. I find the more I touch myself, the deeper my voice gets.

Steve: Let's just say I hope Lindsay's call was monitored and recorded, 'cause it was sexy as hell!

Klaus: Oh, Steve.

Steve: You sound just like Lindsay!

Bahama Mama[edit]

Stan: Ah, Saturday afternoon TV. Where the sneaky networks hide all the good shows. [changes channel] A guy with question marks on his suit yelling tax secrets at me. [changes channel] Rick Steves' Glory Hole in Europe. [changes channel] And of course, the secret final episode of Caroline in the City.

[Cut to Caroline carrying an axe covered in blood with a crazed look on her face looking at her other cast members brutally killed]

Caroline: Now the city is mine!

[Stan laughs]

Stan: Still holds up!

Roger: Well, suck me off through a hole and call me Rick Steves, what is this?

Steve: It's Baywatch. You've never seen Baywatch?

Francine: You like this, Roger?

Roger: Franny, I like the smell of gasoline. I like to play with Stan's ding-a-ling while he sleeps. This.. this I love!

Stan: Wait, wh-what was the second thing?

Roger's Baby[edit]

Hayley: Where did you get a pregnancy test with sound effects?

Jeff: At Spencer's Gifts.

Roger: Let's call him Jeff. I'm starting to think Tristan is a gay lion's name.

Ninety North, Zero West[edit]

Francine: Santa has kidnapped Steve!

Jack: Steve Harvey? Santa's gone too far this time!

Santa: So you're really not here to foil my plans?

Steve: No, I swear! I was just trying to have a nice Christmas.

Santa: Then what am I hassling you for? [to his henchman] Cut his throat. But make it Christmas-y

Whole Slotta Love[edit]

Steve: You don't know anything about being a flight attendant.

Roger: But I do know comedy, and that's all that matters at Southwest.

Hayley: With you there, people should check their sensitivities at the gate.

Roger: Oh my God, that's like a perfect Southwest joke! I want that joke!

American Dad Casino Normale

Klaus: I've been experimenting with steroids. It's awesome! Now I wear tank tops with the thinnest straps you've ever seen.

The Witches of Langley[edit]

Toshi: [in Japanese] This day has been badass.

Steve: It sure has, Toshi, my friend. Hey! I understand Tosh!

Toshi: [in Japanese] Finally! Now that we can communicate, there is something I must tell you.. I absolutely adore the Pirates of the Caribbean movies.

Steve: Oh. Cool.

Snot: We used the book, and it worked. But then all the power went straight to Steve's head.

Roger: When you're older, I'll show you where all the power goes straight to on me.

A Nice Night for a Drive[edit]

Steve: This is pretty high up. What if the egg shatters their windshield?

Snot: I thought you might say that. [He pulls out a cracked egg] Pre-cracked shells.

Steve: God, you know me.

Casino Normale[edit]

Klaus: Vaginas don't count. They're like all over the place. Throw a rock, you'll hit three.

Bazooka Steve[edit]

Roger(as he's coming in the kitchen, pulling a cart): In a school fire, you gotta know what you want, 'cuz the clock is ticking, but I nailed it. I got an overhead projector, a hand turkey by 'Emily C.', and 12 dozen smoke-damaged copies of Hatchet.

Hayley: Oh yeah, I owe you a dime. Just grab it out of the change bowl.

Roger: Is there a thousand dollars cash in that bowl? 'Cause that's what a dime is in gambler's lingo.

Hayley: Who knows that?!

Jeff: Everyone knows that, babe. I thought you were crazy to make that bet. I almost said something.

Roger: It had been days since Hayley watched MasterChef Junior with me. I told her I'd wait for her, but I didn't. I couldn't. Peyton made a souffle. Eight years old, making a souffle. Imagine that.

Camp Campawanda[edit]

Snot: Camper Steve was about to commit a panty raid.

Chief Danny: By himself? That's kind of a bummer.

Steve: Okay, guys. I did a little panty raid recon on the girl's cabin..

Paul: Actually, we're not doing the panty raid.

Steve: Why not?

Paul: Well, we've talked about it and we get the feeling that you're a pretty nerdy fourteen year old. But us, we're pretty cool ten-year-olds. I've kissed three girls this summer. So we're feeling we should avoid anything that you do.

Steve: Okay, first of all, Paul.. fuck you.

Julia Rogerts[edit]

Roger: My roses are like bones in a desert.

Old Lady: I haven't had a bone in my desert in years.

Steve: Jeff is meeting Barry today. I need the room.

Hayley: Oh God, that's today? I have to give Jeff his bath!

Steve: [to Hayley] You were supposed to give him a bath last night! [to Francine] And you were supposed to go to the mall!

Francine: I didn't want to go by myself.

Steve: That's what we have Klaus for.

The Life and Times of Stan Smith[edit]

Klaus: [On visiting Arizona State] Oh, man. If you knew what I had in store for you, all your worries would melt away. You'd be swaddled tight, wrapped safely in my freshly laundered plans.

Steve: Klaus, what the fuck are you talking about?

Francine: [Concerned about shocking Stan] Roger. this finger zapping thing isn't going to hurt, right?

Roger: Not a bit. [Stan collapses in convulsions as Roger shocks him]

Francine: You said it wouldn't hurt.

Roger: No, I said it wouldn't hurt me. You need to listen girl.

The Bitchin' Race[edit]

Klaus: [Watching Meredith and Justin on television] I know I should root for someone in the family, but Justin has captured my heart. Oh, I'd love to throw it to his mom while he was sleeping like an angel in the next room.

Roger: [Interpreting a bar patron's drink order as a pick up] Whoa, you got the wrong idea. I'm not some prostitute who's going to take you to the back room. I'm a freewheeling party boy who'll slob your knob right here. Just untuck your Tommy Bahama and give me a little privacy curtain.

Family Plan[edit]

Casino Normale From American Dad

Nicholas: And these must be my granddaughters.

Francine: Um, yes, yes, they are.

Steve: Mom!

Francine: Just go with it.

[After learning that Cassandra committed suicide]

Steve: Momma, the man said someone died upstairs. What if I see a g-g-g-ghost?

Francine: I don't know Steve, you'll probably p-p-p-piss your pants.

The Long Bomb[edit]

Stan: [Imitating Steve] Hey mom, where's the applesauce? [Imitating Francine] In the fridge, Steve. [Imitating Steve] I only see watery-ass Kroger, where's the Mott's? [Imitating Francine] They taste the same. [Imitating Steve] HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIIIIIIND?!

Johnny Concussion: Johnny Concussion always gets up.

Kloger[edit]

American Dad Casino Normale Music

Steve: Snot, we're screwed. This guy's gonna put us back in diapers.

Snot: What do you mean, 'back in'? Some of us never left.

Roger: Text bubbles are made out of flesh-eating bacteria. You didn't know that?

Garbage Stan[edit]

Klaus: I really hope there's a Darryl Strawberry rookie card in your grandpop's unit.

Steve: Sorry, Klaus. Even if we found a Rebecca Lobo rookie card, I'd leave it there. Dad would be so angry if he found out about this. I just wanna learn a little bit more about Grandpa.

Klaus: You'd take the Lobo.

Steve: I'd have to.

Stan: The way the dashboard and the windshield smush the hash browns together with the sausage..

Steve: We should call 'em 'dash browns.'

Stan: You just think of that?

Steve: Just now.

The Talented Mr. Dingleberry[edit]

Roger: [whispering] Hey. Hey. Up here. [Steve looks up, to see Roger in a vent] Want to get back at A.J. and win that talent show? I can help.

Steve: [walks under Roger's vent and looks at in quizzically] What-- what are you doing in there?

Roger: I'm trapped. I dropped a Skittle down a vent, and I went in after it. I've been in here for days. Get a Phillips-head screwdriver and meet me by the vent in Hayley's bathroom. [notices something offscreen] Oh. Oh, there-- uhp, there's the Skittle. Went down this slightly narrower passageway here.

[Roger crawls further into the vents offscreen, until a metallic scraping sound is heard, and the sound of his crawling abruptly stops]

Roger: Shit.

Steve: Wow, you move just like a dummy!

[Roger slaps Steve]

Roger: Now, Steve. Why do you think I slapped you? It's because you used a certain word. Do you know what that word is?

Steve: Is it..

[Roger slaps Steve again]

Roger: That's right. Never, ever call me a dummy. The word 'dummy' is degrading. I am a manually-articulated performative kinesio-maquette.. named Dudley Dingleberry.

Steve: Please tell me you didn't have anything to do with A.J.'s accident.

Roger: Let's just say that as far as us winning the talent show goes, the bar was just lowered.

Steve: That, uh.. that's not the most convincing denial.

[after Roger has injected Steve with paralyzing agent, knocking him out]

Roger: The show must go on.

[Roger looks over, and sees Klaus watching in shock and holding a book]

Klaus: A-Am I early for book club?

Roger: No, you're late! And that's two weeks in a row! You're out!

Klaus: I didn't read it anyway.

West to Mexico[edit]

Roger: I blew the punchline. That's what it was. Still, the setup was rock solid.

Roger: In a hundred years, when there's a million jerks riding around Manhattan drunk in limos, the west will seem like a paradise.

External links[edit]

American Dad Casino Normale Full Episode